Some Tweets About Spring Cleaning

It’s officially spring, which means longer days, changing temperatures and, of course, spring cleaning.
While cleaning out your house may seem like a gargantuan task, many funny folks on Twitter have proven that the annual tradition is rife with opportunities for humor.
Below find 40 hilarious tweets about spring cleaning ― and cleaning all year round.

Did a bunch of spring cleaning and now I’m the proud new owner of another box of random cords.
— Simon Holland

Me: Half of this stuff is junk we don’t need.

Wife: The other half is mine.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn

“Who said your 40s aren’t full of magic,” I say to myself as I stand in the cleaning aisle swooning over sponges that are in my favorite color.
— Cathryn

Fantasia gave me unrealistic expectations of how much cleaning a bucket and mop would be motivated to do.
— A Very TheAlexNevil Christmas

Come on in; excuse the mess, as I pretend that I didn’t spend an hour rage-cleaning just to get it to the point where I could pretend THIS is “messy”.
— Stephanie Ortiz

RT if you’re pumped to do some Spring Cleaning followed by a little Spring “Fuck It, No One Ever Looks In This Closet”-ing.
— The Dad

Just got done with a deep cleaning of my kitchen so no one will be eating, drinking or even standing in here for the next 10 years.
— ?Sarcastic Mommy?

After doing some spring cleaning, I now have 3 plastic bins in my house labeled “horse shit” so I’m ready to be on Hoarders like whenever.
— Lurkin’ Mom

Simplify your spring cleaning by throwing everything out the window.
— Annekinns

I don’t believe in the devil, but after cleaning out the shower drain, I know for certain that evil is real.
— Dad and Buried

Whenever I’m done cleaning the kitchen I sing this really cool song to my family called “no one’s allowed in the mother fucking kitchen until tomorrow song.”
— Jiffy VVild

I hate cleaning so much that were I to commit murder inside my house, I’d turn myself in just so to avoid cleaning that shit up.
— Carbosly

“Do what you’re supposed to or no dessert!”

-Me talking myself into cleaning the house
— MamaFizzles

Neighbor: I didn’t know you were moving!

Me: Oh, we’re not. Just cleaning underneath our son’s bed.
— ?Sarcastic Mommy?

Me: *finishes cleaning*

Wife: You missed a spot.

Me: Where?

Wife: *motions to the entire house*
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn

I wish I spent as much energy cleaning my house as I do worrying about people unexpectedly stopping by and seeing my dirty house.
— Molly England

I’m cleaning out the basement if anyone needs a mint condition box and user manual for a cordless phone I haven’t had in 10 years.
— Simon Holland

I was cleaning and accidentally broke a bottle of wine.
I learned my lesson.
It’s better to live in filth.
— Sara Says Stop

Spring cleaning: When we throw out family heirlooms, but keep 36 different kinds of tea
— Robert Knop

Did a little spring cleaning today. If anyone’s missing a matchbox car, I apologize. Apparently I had every one ever made in my car.
— Lurkin’ Mom

I’m pretty certain my husband picked a fight with me so that I would start rage cleaning.
— TheBabyLady

Sunday is the day I set aside for cleaning the house.

But it seems I’ve missed the last 14 or so Sundays so this may take a minute.
— Lady Lawya

House cleaning tip:
Mindlessly shove everything in random drawers.
— Sara Says Stop

Anyone who wants to say “Sunday Funday” to me while I’m doing 80 loads of laundry & cleaning mess after mess, I dare you to come at me.
— ?Sarcastic Mommy?

If you find me cleaning my apartment the odds are about 70% it’s because I think I might have sex that night.
— Jess

The trick to spring cleaning is to keep moving things to different rooms until your wife gets tired and gives up.
— Robert Knop

I started my Spring cleaning by moving my kids to their new home outside.
— Sara

Spring cleaning has been rescheduled for Summer. Because I said so.
— Cathryn
I’ve been spring cleaning for 15 years.— The Next Martha

When you finish cleaning a room and then remember that your house has like a dozen other rooms
— Lauren Mullen

Kid: what’s in this box?
Husband: that’s mom’s degree
Kid: so… garbage pile?
Husband: lol
Kid: lol
Me: lol
My College Professor, somehow: lol
— Ash (an female) ⚪️ (@adult_mom)

Cleaning the house after drinking a pitcher of mimosas is a fun way to make simple household tasks more challenging.

5 mins cleaning, 1 hr playing on phone. 5 mins cleaning, 1 hr playing on phone. 20 min speed-clean, tell husband that I cleaned all day.
— Valerie

Wife: I know you want to exercise Saturday so I’m taking our son to the Aquarium.
Me: Thanks.
Wife: Probably the best exercise would be cleaning out our storage.
— dadpression

The key to spring cleaning is to put your stuff at the top of all the piles so it looks like your are throwing a lot of stuff away.
— Robert Knop

Told Hubs I was cleaning the garage. Did 5 mins of busy work until he came out to “help.” Now I’m watching him clean the garage.

— Lady Lawya

My version of spring cleaning is moving.
— Abbi Crutchfield